*I think everyone who gets in trouble goes to rehab. Whatever bad behavior they’ve indulged in they somehow feel that they are cleansed. Let’s call it the Betty Ford Confessional
 
*I actually think that some folks who write autobiographies make things up to make themselves seem more complex and, of course, to help move more books
 
*I think that unless your local NBA team has a Kobe, a LeBron, or a jersey with a shamrock on it, you’ve got about a 2 percent chance of winning the NBA title
 
*I think that if the salary cap ever goes away, the NFL will lose any semblance of balance. Jerry Jones will make Steinbrenner look like Scrooge
 
*Swine Flu is awful but I don’t think people realize that malaria kills over one million people a year and most of them are children
 
*I am so addicted to watching things on my DVR that after I set it up to record I forget what day/time/channel they’re actually on
 
*Speaking of the DVR, I wonder if advertisers know most of us fast forward through the commercials?
 
*I think the DirecTV ad with David Spade and Chris Farley is in really poor taste
 
*I think the state of Wisconsin needs to make the 2nd OWI a felony
 
*I think people on the far left and far right don’t even know how close they are to one another
 
*From here on out I think all political debates should be problem-solving contests. Sort of like Iron Chef   politics. You get 45 minutes and 2 trusted advisors to help you solve a “surprise” problem presented. We, the people, will decide who the best problem solver is. After all, isn’t that really the crux of it?
 
*I still think my idea of a cable network called “The Shoe Network” would be huge.
 
*I think our live Christmas show this year at the Riverside is gonna ROCK…Get your tickets ;~)

Hey Mr. Balloon Man

Getting 15 minutes of fame doesn’t make your life meaningful. Just because you get a TV show, just because the news media is following your mylar balloon across the sky; it means nothing. Do you really need to be told? I believe that God (or whatever your idea of God is) didn’t put us on Earth to see how many Facebook friends we could get or if we could get on TV.

How did our ancestors find meaning in their lives? They couldn’t even Tweet! I’m guessing by spending time with their families, working hard, paying bills and trying to make the world a better place. I say we make the world a better place by making an example of Mr. Balloon Man. Not to mention, what kind of Dad gets his kids to conspire to commit a felony? And, what about Mrs. Balloon-Man? Can any of you guys imagine trying to convince the “little woman” that this is a good idea? How did he pull that off? How gullible is she? Was she drugged or maybe hypnotized?

Throw the book at him and, I’m with Carole, get him on felony child abuse, too.

I’d like to write more, but I’m busy working on editing all of my alien autopsy footage. That should get me on TV for sure. Don’t you think?